Will it ever change?

As ever, this week has had some ups and downs. I’ve taken them out on some quite nice walks but the weather was absolutely dreadful. Will it ever change? Yesterday was a lovely day, but more about that a bit later. The week started OK, it was relatively dry but flamin’ cold. My regular fans may recall that I had noticed him trying to make a sourdough starter that he had called “Nigel”. It didn’t go well. Firstly, he noticed that there were weevils in the flour (apparently that isn’t good) so the flour got thrown out and Daddy Richard went off to buy more. Then, as new flour had been procured, he ran into the next problem … apparently “Nigel” is supposed to rise (nope, I have no idea either but I really can’t be bothered to look it up!) and he didn’t. That was bad apparently. Then there was a problem with the smell – apparently it is supposed to smell yeasty and pleasant and it didn’t. I don’t think it has gone well. I’m not sure what has happened to “Nigel” but I have noticed there is a new one now called “Colin”. He seems to be a bit happier with “Colin”, so I think the project is going to carry on for a while. (Until he realises he’s rubbish at that too!)

On Monday and Tuesday I had a bit of an upset tummy again. I’m not sure what it was that was upsetting me but I wasn’t feeling at my best. I had a touch of the ‘top 5 hits’ if you see what I mean. Of course, as ever, I got no sympathy from him. All he did was threaten me that if it hadn’t cleared up by Wednesday he was going to have to cancel my wimming session because I’m not allowed to go if I have had an upset tum in the preceding 24 hours. No flamin’ consideration for me whatsoever! Anyway, by Wednesday it had cleared up so he didn’t need to cancel my wimming. Talking of Wednesday, in the evening they had their annual ‘Spring Challenge’ between the Godstone Gardeners’ Club and Hurst Green Gardening Club. I didn’t go, so I’m not really interested but basically it is a competition to show who can grow the best daffodils and a few other plants. There’s a class for a photo too. This year it was to show ‘the first signs of spring’. He put in a photo of me in the churchyard next to some snowdrops but it didn’t win … clearly the judge must have missed my photo amongst all of the others as I am quite clearly the most handsome dog in dogdom and the snowdrops were quite nice too. Anyway, the good news (for them) is that Godstone Gardeners’ Club won … by one point … so when they eventually came home, they were in a good mood for a change!

Out for a walk on Thursday morning before I went for my wimming session, the sun finally showed its face! We had a lovely walk along Salisbury Road, Oxted Road and Church Lane before we strolled (well, I may have pulled us a bit) down Bay Pond path. With the sun shining it was lovely to see the pond looking so good. Mind you, it came to something when he kept on moaning because I didn’t want to look at “Mr and Mrs Mallard” – I mean, why do I want to look at a flamin’ duck when I can look at my own reflection! Anyway, I see “Mr and Mrs Mallard” almost every day and just because the sun was shining I didn’t see what difference that made to things. It still wasn’t overly warm though but the sun made me feel slightly hopeful that Spring was finally on its way … which is important because that means I can get to go to places like Hilly Fields which are still too muddy at the moment. We were only back for about half and hour when we all bundled into the car thingy and we went off for my wimming session. I have developed a new game there – I plant myself on the floor of reception and then wait to be carried through! It is great fun, although I am not sure that my personal therapists, Katie, Emily and Zoe are over impressed. I’m absolutely fine when I get in for my wimming but I quite like my game. This week they accused me of being a “right diva” – I have looked this up on Doogle and it is a name for a lady person who is a bit temperamental, so I don’t know what they are talking about!

On Friday just after lunch they went off out again without me. I am getting used to this, although I can’t honestly say I approve. When they came back from wherever it was they had been, you won’t believe it, but somehow or other Grandma had come back with them! It was really nice to see her but, although I kept looking, there was no sign of Auntie Jo anywhere. I thought she might be hiding, but I don’t think she was. I think that Auntie Jo wasn’t able to come this time, but I did keep going back to the door just to check. It was lovely to see Grandma though and, although I did steel her slippers, I think she was pleased to see me too! On Saturday we went out for the afternoon to a place called Sheffield Park. I have actually been there before but that was a really long time ago and I didn’t really remember. We had a nice walk around the gardens which, according to him were designed by some bloke called ‘Capability Brown’. I did Doogle ‘Capability Brown’ and discovered that he was actually called ‘Lancelot’ and had a wife called Bridget who was known as ‘Biddy’ (why can’t they just use their own names like I do!) and that they had seven children – frankly, I’m surprised he ever found the time or energy to design any gardens with that lot! Apparently he designed over 170 parks (according to Fidopedia) which means he was pretty prolific in two areas of his life! There were quite a lot of other dogs in Sheffield Park but they didn’t pull their Daddies around like a freight train like I did! We went so fast that we had to go to the tea rooms afterwards so that Grandma could have a cup of tea and recover a bit. She isn’t quite as fast as me but then she is 87 which is 538 in dog years, so she’s getting on a bit!

When we had finished our tea (well actually I didn’t have any but I did have a quick slurp of the water that was in the water bowl by the entrance) we started to walk back towards where we had parked. Now I may have mentioned this in the past but he isn’t very bright … has a brain about the size of a sea urchin, if you get my gist. (Go on, look it up … I dare you!) Anyway, he doesn’t seem to have worked out that I do not like the car thingy! He also doesn’t appear to have worked out that, not only am I the most handsomest dog in dogdom but, I am also the most intelligent! I knew we were walking back towards the car thingy so I made life as difficult as I possibly could and kept pulling in the opposite direction and sitting down. We eventually made it back to the car thingy but only after a lot of huffing and puffing and muttering under his breath! He opened the boot and then called “Up!” – is he completely mad? Does he seriously think that I am going to jump into the back of the car thingy all on my own and voluntarily? Honestly, sometimes I really do wonder! Eventually he got the message and lifted me into the back of the car thingy. (I am actually quite capable of jumping in but I’m not going to do that if I can get him to lift me in, now am I?!)

This morning the weather hasn’t been quite so good. It isn’t cold but it isn’t sunny like it was yesterday. Just for a change this morning I took them up over Hilly Fields. It is still quite muddy up there, but it was OK. In Hilly Fields itself I ran about off lead. I had a jolly good run about although I did seem to get into spot of trouble when I kept running a long way away to the edge of the fields where I know there are rabbits about and when I ignored them calling me. I could hear them perfectly well, but I was not going to go back to them until I had fully explored and checked out the rabbit situation. As it was, I couldn’t find any rabbits, so I decided I would go back … after all he did have some rather tasty treats on offer! We walked up The Hollow to the haul route and then down the haul route to North Park Lane. We did look at the path towards Tylers Close field but even I have to admit it was a bit too wet and muddy … even for me! We walked down North Park Lane and through the footpath back to the A25. When we got to The Green I decided that I wanted a run about there too. I dragged him across the road and had a good run around for a while. Eventually, he decided that it was time to go home – I decided it was time to lie down and have a jolly good roll about. After a couple of successful lay down and roll abouts, he managed to get me to cross the road. I was not at all happy about it and I dragged my feet all the way home! He has now accused me of sulking so I am not talking to him. Anyway I am pretty tired after all my running about this morning, so I think I am going to put out a few ????s. In fact, I think my ????s are quite urgent now and as I am not talking to him anyway, I shall do so forthwith so, for now, must paws … ????