Tempus fugit …

I looked that one up – it means ‘Time Flies’ and comes from an ancient language called ‘Latin’. Actually, it turns out that there are quite a lot of words that have their origins in Latin. Fidopedia has loads on it but I got a bit bored so I haven’t bothered to do any more research. Quite a lot has been going on and just finding time to put paw to keyboard has been very difficult. I’m trying to think of all the things that have been happening but strangely all I can think of is sausages! Anyway, one thing has changed in my life … he’s got a new car thingy. It’s all electric and I think that must be good because every time we pass a petrol station he seems very pleased with himself – particularly with the price of fuel at the moment! Not that I really understand what that’s all about but whenever we pass a petrol station either he or Daddy Richard make a comment saying “Crumbs! Did you see the price of diesel there?” and then follow it up with some rather smug remarks! The only thing I will say is that it is much more comfortable than the old car thingy and I really quite like it. I still can’t jump into the boot but I can get my front paws up there!

Actually, we’ve been out in the car thingy quite a bit recently. We’ve even bin on ‘oliday but we’ll come to that in a minute. I have discovered that if I pick up piglet after I have stolen Daddy Richard’s glasses I can almost hide the fact that I have his glasses in my mouth! I steal Daddy Richard’s glasses most days because he’s always leaving them around in places where I can get them. He seems to have worked out (unbelievably when you consider his challenging level of intelligence) that he needs to leave his glasses out of reach and then I won’t steal them. Anyway, the weather has been so awful recently that we’ve even started walking on new walks. We still do Salisbury Road, Oxted Road, Church Lane and Bay Pond Path but Green Lane (I do not know why they call a muddy footpath a ‘lane’!) has been so muddy it has been out of the question, so we’ve started doing Salisbury Road, then the other direction in Oxted Road and up Godstone Hill, turn into Tylers Close and then through Orchard Lane and back through Dumville Drive. It isn’t the best all in the world but it is less muddy and there are several opportunities to shorten it if the weather gets really bad!

Ah yes, back to me ‘oliday. We went on an actual boat and everything!! We went to this place called the Isle of Wight. We went with Nana and Grandad too. I wasn’t feeling too good when we left, I was having a bit of trouble in the bottom department so he was dreading the journey in case I was ill. Typical of him, he wasn’t worried about me, just whether I would be ill on the journey!! Anyway, I was fine. We drove to this place called Portsmouth and then got a ferry to the Isle of Wight. When we got there we drove to our farm house that they had rented. It was actually really nice. It was quite big and had lovely tiled floors which were really cool to lay one. I had a three acre garden to play in and then, when I wanted to explore a bit more we went off and explored the additional thirty three acres of farm land. No need for a lead, there were no animals and we were allowed to go where we liked. I had a fabulous time even though I still wasn’t feeling too good for the first few days. Even he had to acknowledge that I was ill because I didn’t eat for four days and that’s unheard of!!

I spent quite a bit of time sleeping and eventually started to feel better. I did get a bit grouchy with Grandad but it was only because I wasn’t feeling very well and he kept on waking me up and telling me I was a good boy … which I knew already and didn’t need to be told!! I made it up to Grandad when I was feeling a bit better though so we’re alright again now. We did do a bit of exploring – we went to Ventnor first which was not far from our farmhouse which was near Godshill. It was called Upper Dolcoppice Farmhouse and it was really good. The only downside was that I wasn’t allowed upstairs but the floors were so call that I coped OK. We went to Shanklin and we went to Newport (actually we went round Newport about six times because we couldn’t find the entrance to Morrisons but then Daddy Richard is not known for his sense of direction!) and we went to Sandown. We had a lovely drive around the island and visited Yarmouth. He seemed to remember Yarmouth as being bigger than it was but I thought it was a nice place for a walk.

We visited Cowes and had a really good walk around there. When we went back to Sandown we decided that it was a little bit SBD (seen better days) but it may have just been because the season hadn’t yet started and the weather was a bit grim. Not that it bothered me but the one thing they seemed to find a bit unfortunate was that it was very windy … almost all of the time. I had a nice walk along the prom at Shanklin but the weather was a bit grim again. It did rain most days but I suppose it was only early March. Anyway, we had a good ‘oliday and by the middle of the week I was feeling completely better and back to my old self. I made it up with Grandad and we were all OK again. He got a bit grumpy when we were coming home though. Nana wanted to go shopping in Sainsbury’s because she had vouchers that were going to expire. He explained that the car was full, the top box was full, half the boot had been taken up with things so that I only had a small space to sleep in (actually it was fine but it was smaller than usual), so he told Nana that we couldn’t got to Sainsbury’s as we didn’t have the space.

I don’t think Nana quite got the message because she then said that if she couldn’t got to Sainsbury’s before she left, maybe we could stop off at a Sainsbury’s on the way home. I’m not exactly sure what his response to that was but he went quite red in the face, just like he does with me sometimes, and was making lots of muttering noises that involved a lot of phuf noises. Anyway, we didn’t got to Sainsbury’s on the way home but as soon as we got home him and Daddy Richard unloaded the car thingy and then took Nana straight to Sainsbury’s without her even getting the cup of tea she wanted! I stayed at home with Grandad where the air was somewhat calmer and the atmosphere definitely better!

A couple of weeks ago we went somewhere new. We went out in the car thingy to a place called Outwood Common. It is like a wooded area (quite big) with a stream running through it and loads of places to explore. The downside (well upside for at the time) was that it was very, very muddy! I got covered which meant I had to be hosed down unceremoniously in the garden when we got home. All he was worrying about was me getting mud all over his car thingy! Well, actually, that’s not true. We were a good half mile or so into the common when along came a black Labrador. He had a harness on but no tag and no sign of any owners. He was very bouncy and kept trying to bite me. We had a bit of a fight if I’m honest and I had to really growl at him to get him to back off a bit. Then he tried to bite him and he got his arm. It wasn’t like he was trying to do anything of get in his way, he was just not a very nice black lab. Not like Eric who can be a bit bouncy but is pretty OK most of the time. Anyway, still no sign of any owners and I was really not happy about him biting him. I know I sometimes have a little moan about him (with good cause!) but that wasn’t on! I really growled and barked at the lab until he finally ran off. He had a thick jacket on, imagine the damage if he hadn’t had! I really can’t see us going back there for a while.

Actually we saw Eric today. I haven’t seen him for a while. I stole his ball off him … obviously! But eventually Auntie Sue managed to get it back off me and it somehow disappeared. I’ve just remembered I should mention tomato-gate. You see, Daddy Richard planted some tomato seeds a bit early on the window sill in the kitchen. They did rather well. Actually, they’ve done so well that they are already flowering and at this rate we’ll be cropping tomatoes by next week. The chillies that Daddy Richard has on the window sill are also doing well, although he has planted a whole range of chillies that are doing very well in the greenhouse. Actually, talking of the greenhouse, I have virtually been barred from entering. A few days ago I popped in to find a nice roll of fleece. I picked it up and took it outside and shredded it for him. Then a couple of days later, I wandered into the greenhouse to find some rather attractive nasturtium plants that he had grown from seed. I took one outside, tried it for taste (disgusting), tipped it out, kicked the compost around in the garden and chewed the plant pot to pieces. Apparently that was wrong too! Then, a few days ago I popped in to the greenhouse and found a stack of plant pots were on the staging. I jumped up, knocked them onto the floor (that took a bit of doing!) then kicked them out into the garden and set about chewing them up. Honestly, I don’t know what I have to do – apparently that was wrong too!!! Anyway, I have already established beyond any doubt in previous years that everything he grows is bordering on the inedible side and it all tastes pretty disgusting to me. He would be much better off to stop wasting his time and do something useful … like take me out for a walk or, even better, give me something to eat!

Actually, talking of eating, I have a particular penchant for ice cubes. I really rather like them. Most evenings there is ice floating around somewhere in the house (usually in their glasses full of scotch but that’s a whole different story!) and so I get a few ice cubes. Recently though they have not been as forthcoming as I would like. I like to be given an ice cube every couple of minutes, as soon as I have finished the last one. He seems to think I should wait a bit and that I am being some kind of nuisance by wanting them all evening like that. So he’s been making me wait. I don’t like waiting! I have come up with a rather good game of staring him out until I get an ice cube. I just stand there and stare at him. I don’t move, I just stare. Eventually, he gives in and gives me the required ice cube! And so, that’s about it for now. I have heard that Auntie Fran had a bad fall, so I hope she gets better very soon. I also heard that Uncle Don is going to be even older than he is now by tomorrow. Wow, he must be really ancient by now!!! Anyway, enough of all this, it is time for another ice cube so, for now, must paws …🐾