Here we go again …

Before I begin, I must apologise to all my fans. You see, I am actually still indisposed in the hospital. I have had to ask him to write a blog for me and you know what he’s like. I may have mentioned in the past that he’s not all that bright … one sausage short of a hot dog, if you get my gist! Well, it just goes to show what I mean that he is writing down what I have told him to and just put that bit in! Anyway, I felt an update was in order. Since I last updated my loyal fan base on my situation, I had a jolly good weekend. On Saturday morning I dragged him and Richard down to the Café Connect coffee morning. I had a lovely time in there and met loads of people I haven’t seen for a while. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw Mrs P and then, coming out of the kitchen, Angela! In fact, I had forgotten to leave her a present on her doorstep, so it was really nice to see her in person. I saw loads of other people and they both spent loads of money. I don’t think he was all that happy when Richard returned from one of the stalls with a pot of honey. He said something like “We already have the European honey lake, the last thing we need is more of the stuff!”

Anyway, Saturday morning was lovely. I had to take it easy because the Youth Centre is about as far as I was allowed to walk (at that time). Anyway, we wandered back slowly and then later in the afternoon I took them out for a quick sniff around Court Road. It was all very satisfactory. It was lovely to be out in the fresh air for a change and, although I knew that time was short, I wanted to make the most of it. I should say that when I got back from Café Connect, would you believe my luck, Jake popped in to see me! That was luvely and I got to spend a bit of quality time with him. Actually, I must say that Saturday was a really good day. Apparently humans have a saying, something about ‘the lull before the storm’ – I have looked this up on Doogle and one of the many online dictionaries that I have found (why are there so many and why do they vary so much?) said that it is a time that seems quite but will very soon be followed by something unpleasant. Well, they’re not wrong there are they! Something very unpleasant was looming for Monday, but I was doing my best not to think about it.

Sunday was another quiet day. We spent a bit of time in the garden whilst he tried to fix his leaking watering systems (yes, there were several leaks!) and we popped to East Grinstead to Screwfix to buy some bits he needed – which weren’t available so we popped to Crawley to B&Q because their website said the bits were there, but when we got there it turned out that that particular branch doesn’t stock them, so we popped to Toolstation where they had everything and at a cheaper price! I think there is a lesson there, although, frankly, I can’t be bothered to work it out! I have to say for some reason that I haven’t really worked out, I don’t mind the car at all now. I quite enjoy a ride in the car and we nearly always go somewhere where I can have a jolly good sniff and a poo! Anyway after we had popped to Horley to Waitrose, we popped home again and he fixed his leaks which was good and bad. He was definitely pleased about his leaks, but I have less opportunity to try and catch and drink the water!

Richard wanted to set another hare running over the weekend. He seems to have a lot of hares unlike him who has very few! Anyway, that meant a quick trip in the car to Purley to buy a bookcase. I have looked up what you do with a bookcase and it appears you put books on it. Honestly, have you humans thought that through? Why on earth do you need books? Have you not heard of the Tinternet and Fidopedia! Anyway, a bookcase was duly ordered. It turns out I am not allowed to go into John Lewis at home, but they don’t sell doggy things and I wasn’t all that interested anyway. There was grass to be sniffed and, frankly, I produced a rather spectacular two bagger whilst Richard was in the store. He had to carry it around for ages because he couldn’t find a bin! The bad news was that by this time my hip had popped out again. It didn’t really matter that much because I was going into the hospital in the morning and it didn’t actually cause me any pain, but it did demonstrate that I needed another operation.

Monday morning came around all too quickly! We had been out for a meal on Sunday evening to a pub called the Bletchingley Arms. The people there were very friendly to me an gave me a bowl of water and some biscuits. I did bark quite a bit though, although I have absolutely no idea why! Anyway, here we were again – at the hospital. My personal surgeon, Bonito de la Puerta, was going to put a longer neck in (I gather it has nothing to do with my neck, but is part of the hip implant) which he hoped … well we all hope … is going to be stable and won’t move around. I can’t say it is a lot of fun, but I did my best to keep my chin up. He had to answer lots of questions that the nurse asked – the most important answer was when he told her I need a grain free diet and if they forgot that part they would be the ones that regretted it as grain makes me rather loose! I lay on the floor rather bored at this point but then someone opened the door and I spotted Bonito in the distance. I shot up and out of the door – the last thing I heard was him saying “Bye Mont …..”!

And so, since I have only just had my hip operated on, I can’t really type with only three legs, so I have had to get him to do it. I asked him to get an update out so that my wonderful fans will know what is happening. The good news is that the operation went well and Bonito is very pleased with my progress. He has put the longest neck possible to go with my ball joint and it has set very well. He has sutured it in place too which will help. Today (Tuesday) have been up and walking and I am putting weight on the hip, so all is well. If things continue as they are then I shall be discharged tomorrow afternoon. I am obviously looking forwards to going. home, but it does mean I am going to be stuck with him 24 hours a day for then next six weeks. Oh well, I suppose there is a price one has to pay to get my hip fixed and be fully back to health again. I shall spend the next six weeks dreaming of when I am able to drag him around Hilly Fields once more! In the mean time, I shall just have to rest so, for now, must paws … ????