I should begin by saying that I know it’s not tomorrow! You see … when tomorrow came it all got a little bit busy. Before I knew it, it was tomorrow night and time for bed so it has to be today, the day after tomorrow but the day before the next tomorrow! He is away for a couple of days in a place called Monaco at one of his ‘conferences’ (I still don’t understand why anyone would want to listen to him!), so I’m getting to spend some quality time with Daddy Richard and getting a bit of peace for a change. Anyway, enough of this … what about Charlie? Ah yes, so we arrived and I was sooooo excited to see Charlie. I think he was excited to see me too. As soon as I could I jumped straight out of the car thingy and ran inside the house as quickly as I could. The first thing I came across was Charlie’s food bowl but before I had even had a proper mouthful it was whipped away! So, I ran into the garden, just pausing long enough for him to take my lead off. Then the fun really began! Charlie and I ran around that garden like the fastest dogs in dogdom! We chased each other, then we swapped who was chasing who, then we just ran around again until Charlie had a bit of a lay down to get his breath back. (I was actually quite glad of this myself because it gave me a chance for a bit of a rest without having to admit that I was tired too!) Then, once Charlie had got his breath back, we ran around again! It was such fun! I really do love seeing Charlie and I am going to have a serious woof with him to make sure that we don’t leave it too long again! I’m quite hopeful that Charlie might even come and visit me if he is in England at some point. I could show him Bay Pond Path and Green Lane! Fortunately, it was one of those rare occasions when he managed to remember to take some photos but there are so many of them, that I have created a gallery below to show them to you!
After we left Charlie it all felt a little flat. Worse, on our way home we stopped off at a French Doggy Doctor who gave me pills and stamped my passport! I wouldn’t mind but when I get the necessary worming tablets from my own personal Doggy Doctor, I get them in a chew not as tablets. I don’t much like taking tablets … or Doggy Doctors other than my own personal one, they tend to poke me about and shove tablets down my throat! When we got there the waiting room was really quite busy and there was a big sign that said ‘Only two Category 2 dogs allowed in at any one time’ … although actually it was in French so Daddy Richard had to translate it. Having discovered this, I wasn’t sure what a Category 2 dog was, so I relied on Daddy Richard and him to make a decision. It turned out that they didn’t know either, so we waited outside anyway – it was a lovely sunny day anyway! We weren’t in there too long and, although Daddy Richard did ask what a Category 2 dog is, it turned out that I am not one of them and, frankly, I have forgotten what they are now. There was, however, one hiccup when we came out of the Doggy Doctor’s office thingy …
Nana! She showed me no loyalty whatsoever. Whilst I was inside being prodded around and having tablets shoved down my throat, she was outside cuddling up to the opposition! I came out and what did I discover? Her sat there with a cat on her lap! I mean, a cat!!! I am still getting over it now … a flamin’ cat!!! And right there on her lap. Clearly, my preference would have been to chase the blinkin’ thing half way back to England, but for her to have it on her lap and be stroking it, just added insult to injury! I wasn’t even allowed to chase it or bark at it. He marched me straight past and outside. I don’t know what she finds so funny about it. I was totally let down by my own side! I decided that I wasn’t even speaking to her after that – I jumped back into the car thingy and lay straight down without even looking at her! We weren’t back at the house for that long before we went out yet again. I hopped into the car thingy and we drove off. It seemed to take a very long time to get there, but when we arrived I realised that we were back in Fort Mahon Plage where we had been a couple of weeks ago when we had our mobile home there. It wasn’t anything like as busy as it had been previously … in fact, it was pretty quiet. Lots of restaurants were closed, but the one we had been to previously was open, although there was no outside seating. We went inside so that they could all have their muscles and chips. I found I was having trouble settling though … I think it was still shock from the cat incident! It wasn’t until they had almost finished and we were ready to leave that I finally found a bit of cool and comfortable floor space. Just as I put my head down to push out a few ????s, they all got up and we left. Typical! No consideration to go with a distinct lack of loyalty!
Now, I’m not saying I was sulking, but I was definitely not talking to Nana and, frankly, I didn’t have much time for the rest of them either! When we got back to the gite, I took a strategic decision to lay down in the middle of the floor and shut my eyes as hard as I could so that I didn’t have to look at them! I was definitely feeling a bit out of sorts. I had had such a lovely time with Charlie and then the flamin’ cat incident had definitely darkened my mood. That, and the fact that we got up to leave the restaurant just as I got settled, did not please me one bit. I had, however, noticed that Grandad didn’t eat all of his steak and that he had brought some home all wrapped up. On the basis that it might just be coming my way, I decided that I would sleep on things overnight and then assess the situation in the morning. I have to admit that, by the morning, things didn’t seem quite so bad after all and I decided that I would be a bit more friendly to see if I could get my paws on a bit of that steak! I wasn’t all that hungry at breakfast time, so I decided to leave matters to see if I could engineer some steak coming my way. I only ate about half my breakfast, just to leave room.
It turned out that on Thursdays there is a market in Hesdin. Based on his record of finding decent markets earlier in the week, I wasn’t all that hopeful. It transpired that it was, in fact, an OK market. There were enough stalls there to make it worth a sniff and there were some decent food stalls to try and steal from. Of course, I wasn’t allow to steal any food, but it didn’t stop me trying! I reckoned that, after yesterday, I might get away with a bit more mischief but stealing food at the market wasn’t it. And there was a bit of an incident coming up a bit later, but obviously I didn’t know that at the time! We walked around the market firstly without him because he had stayed in the car to do something ‘work related’. Something to do with approving some artwork or something – I don’t know and don’t care! When we had walked around quite a bit of the market we went to a bar so that they could have a cup of coffee. Eventually he turned up and we walked around the rest of the market with Nana (I hadn’t forgiven her, but I thought I should be civil!) whilst Daddy Richard stayed with Grandad in the bar to ‘keep him company’. It seemed to me that Daddy Richard had stayed behind so that he could have a crafty beer, but I would never suggest such a thing! When him and Nana had seen enough, Nana had her cup of coffee. I was a bit bored so I decided to get my lipstick out and give it a jolly good clean. Boy did that not go down well! All I kept hearing was, “Monty! Put it away, you’re embarrassing me! That’s disgusting!”. I reckon the lady on the next table was nearer the truth … she just looked over at him and said, “You’re only jealous! If you could do that you would!”
It may come as a bit of a surprise, but that wasn’t the ‘incident’ I referred to earlier. You see, it was like this … After we left the market we didn’t go straight home. The man who mowed the lawn at our gite had told them about a Nature Reserve that was just the other side of Contes. They thought we should go and have a look at it. We left the market, got back in the car thingy and drove back to Contes, past the house, through the village and there it was. We all got out of the car (except Grandad who decided he would rather stay) and went to have a look around. There were three routes around the nature reserve that were marked out. A 1.5km route, a 2.5km route and a 3km route. Daddy Richard and him decided that, on this occasion and keeping in mind that Nana was with us, we would do just the short 1.5km route. Having surveyed the route he decided that it would be ok for me to walk around off lead. Well, of course it was, what on earth did he expect could happen? I mean, sometimes he really is a bit thick. I think I may have mentioned before that he isn’t very clever … about as useful as a wet towel after a swim, if you get my gist!
Ah, now there-in lies the tale. You see, we were about two thirds of the way around this lovely walk when it happened. The weather had cheered up considerably from the beginning of the week and it was actually quite warm. As we walked around, I saw a few of these little wooden decks. Apparently they were for fishermen to use when fishing in the lake. How was I supposed to know that? I saw them more as launchpads! So, two thirds of the way around, I used one … as a launchpad straight into the lake! Apparently dogs are not supposed to swim in the lake … I didn’t know that either! So I had a little swim before I got a right telling off from him. When I got out, I saw another opportunity … remembering the incident with Nana and that cat yesterday, I realised I now had a perfect opportunity to get my own back. I had acquired quite a bit of pond weed and other debris whilst in the lake and I was very wet indeed. So, I went and stood by Nana and had a jolly good shake!!! She was definitely not happy about that, but I felt justice had been done – I had got my revenge for her lack of loyalty and, anyway, she could always wash the clothes if she was that bothered! Of course he started moaning about me being wet and smelling of ‘pond’ but I didn’t care – I’m used to that!
Anyway, he can’t have been that angry with me really because when we got back to the gite and I had been towelled down, I got that steak after all. It was blinkin’ delicious!!! Being our last full day in France we decided that we should make the most of it. After lunch and when I was pretty near to dry, we all hopped back in the car thingy and went to a place called Le Touquet Paris Plage. I hadn’t been there before. It was quite nice and it is obviously quite popular but there was one thing I did notice … the dogs! The place is absolutely teeming with dogs! Mind you, they weren’t like me. First of all, I am the most handsome dog in dogdom, and secondly, they were all ‘designer dogs’ – tiny little things that were being carried by their humans. Even the bigger ones weren’t half my size and I didn’t see one that I would put even close on the scale of handsomeness! Mind you, I did get a comment on my last missive that Charlie is adorable too. I don’t mind that though … he’s my friend and I think that if people find him adorable that’s OK with me. All the dogs in Le Touquet weren’t adorable, in my opinion, and they all seemed to be very yappy and noisy. If you’re going to bark you should make it worthwhile and bark! Yapping is so unattractive and rather pathetic!
We did have quite a nice time in Le Touquet Paris Plage (everyone calls it Le Touquet … I don’t know why they bother with the Paris Plage bit) and walked all through the town to the beach. When we got to the beach I discovered that, once again, I wasn’t allowed on it. I think they worry that I’ll make a mess, but I am much better behaved than that! Still, it was nice to see the sea and I’m not entirely sure about walking on sand anyway. Daddy Richard, Nana and Grandad had ice creams, but I didn’t bother and he can’t have them because they ‘don’t agree with him’. Mind you, there are lots of things that I ‘don’t agree with him’ about but that’s a whole different issue. I’ll have a go at eating almost anything and if it does upset me, I’ll forget about it and try it all over again. I do have a bit of a sensitive stomach but that tends to be grain related and I don’t often get the opportunity to eat anything with grain because either he or Daddy Richard will stop me. That said, there was another little incident that kind of did involve grain on Friday morning just before we left, but I’ll come to that shortly. We returned from Le Touquet to our gite and settled down for the evening. They decided that, for dinner, they would have ‘bangers and mash’ which seemed to be quite popular! I stuck to my usual dinner having worked up quite an appetite with all that sniffing in the market and then swimming in the lake and then our walk around Le Touquet! We settled down to our last evening in France without further incident. I have to admit that, although I would never admit it to him, I did detect a bit of an aroma of ‘pond’ around me! It wasn’t long before I had dropped off and was pushing out ????s at a heck of a rate!
On Friday morning Daddy Richard and him decided to into Hesdin to buy bread. There is a bakery there that opened just before they sold our French house and it is rather good (Sophie’s). They didn’t take me with them so I kept Grandad company whilst Nana was getting up (she takes a heck of a long time when she’s getting up!). When they returned they laid the table for breakfast and put the lovely fresh bread out. Daddy Richard cut himself a large (does he ever do anything other than large?!) piece of baguette and put it on his plate. Just as he put the bread on his plate, he realised that the kettle had boiled so he got up to make some tea. Well, how could I resist? I mean, it was there, almost exactly at mouth height and smelled so good! I quickly jumped up, grabbed the bread and, before they could even say “Monty!” (which they did in a tone of voice that I’m getting quite used to but don’t much like!) I had wolfed it down! It didn’t actually do me any harm though and Daddy Richard got another piece of bread so nothing bad happened. I don’t know why they all got so excited about it! Breakfast finished, they started the laborious process of packing up their things and loading the car thingy. They put the roof bars back on and the roof box and then started loading it with bags. I don’t know why they need so much stuff! I don’t need anything to travel but they seem to need bags and bags. Mind you, it is funny how my food and water bowls always turn up wherever we go and how there’s usually a good selection of my toys there too! Oh well, there are some things in life that just aren’t worth figuring out! We had a good journey home. When we got home I discovered that Nana and Grandad weren’t going home. Saturday was Daddy Richard’s birthday and they were staying until then. I’ll save telling you about the weekend until another time. I’ve got quite tired paws now and there might have been a couple more ‘incidents’ over the weekend! For now though, must paws … ????
