home diary Hey dude! I’ve been to a festival!

Hey dude! I’ve been to a festival!

It turns out that half a pound of butter isn’t all that good for me! Who knew!!!

OK, now I realise it has been a little while since my last Glog but I’ve been a bit busy. I’ve had a lovely time … mostly. I suppose the not so good time is as good a place as any to begin. You see, it’s like this … I had a bit of an upset tummy. It wasn’t my fault! One night a couple of weeks ago I was patrolling the kitchen in the early hours and I happened across a lovely shiny packet. Obviously this needed further inspection and, when I did, I discovered that it was, in fact, a pack of something that humans call ‘butter’. In an effort to try and see whether it was any good, I decided that I should sample it. I have to admit that it tasted rather good – so I ate the lot! When they eventually appeared the following morning I was fast asleep in the lounge next to an empty butter wrapper. You should have heard them (well, him mainly!) going on about “that dog” (they can be very disrespectful sometimes!) has eaten half a pound of butter! Personally I saw no harm in this whatsoever but a little later in the day my tummy began to make gurgling sounds. It was then that I felt a little bit sick. I wasn’t actually sick but we went out for a walk and I had a very upset tummy! It turns out that half a pound of butter is a bit rich for me – my poo was, for a couple of days, ‘Utterly Buttery’!

I don’t think they realise how much effort goes into being the handsomest dog in dogdom!

For those of my fans lucky enough to be living in the south east of England, they will know that the weather has been luvely and warm over the last couple of weeks. This has an upside and a downside – the upside is that I like the warm weather and it usually results in them being in a better mood. The downside is that I can get very hot and, if I’m not careful, I can overheat. That means that my midday walk sometimes gets cancelled because it is too warm for me to go out walking. Actually, talking of walking, they don’t seem to appreciate that sometimes I quite like a lay down during my walk. I don’t think they realise how much effort goes into being the handsomest dog in dogdom! On a sunny day the ground is often quite cool too so having a lay down on the grass can be quite cooling. Obviously he moans about it and keeps saying that we’re out for a walk not a lay down, but that’s nothing new … he is always moaning about something! Mind you, talking of moaning it won’t come as any surprise to my regular fans to learn that he has found something else to moan about!

Water = wet – it’s hardly rocket science! (I know the garden needs doing, I’ve had a bark with him about it!)

I can hardly be blamed for this one either. You see, the weather has been so warm that I’ve got me paddling pool out again. There’s nothing better than coming in from a luvely walk and having a quick dip in the pool. Obviously, when I get out, I am a little wet. This is where his moaning starts. Firstly, he seems to think that it is unacceptable that, having had a little dip, I should come back into the house and shake off a little water (preferably all over him!) – I can get rid of about 70% of the water in one quick shake! Secondly, he moans about the floor being wet and my jumping on the furniture when I’m wet. Honestly! Duh! I’ve just had a dip in me paddling pool, of course I’m going to be a bit damp! I think I may have mentioned this before but he’s not very clever … I don’t know what makes him so thick … but it really works!! Water = wet – it’s hardly rocket science! Mind you, I don’t think I’d want to trust a rocket if he had anything to do with it. Thinking about it, I don’t think I’d much like a rocket anyway. I’ve only just got used to the car thingy and I don’t really like that much still!

I was flamin’ cream crackered after my run around Marden Park!

I’ve discovered a really good new walking place recently. It’s called Marden Park and it’s near Woldingingingham (I think that’s how you say it). We have to go in the car thingy to get there but it’s worth it. If you do the ‘circular route’ around the park there are loads and loads of places to see and sniff. It’s mostly woodland and the paths through the woods are bwilliant! Horses use them too so there’s quite a lot of horses poo around. I’m quite partial to a bit of horse poo although, needless to say, he doesn’t like me eating it! Actually, Daddy Richard doesn’t like me eating horses poo either. Mind you, Daddy Richard did say something that made me laugh the other day. Everyone knows that we must ‘pick up’ after I have had a poo. We never go anywhere without a pocket full of poo bags and, as my regular fans will know, I can regularly produce a two bagger and sometimes even a three bagger! As we were walking around Marden Park Daddy Richard said, “They should make horse riders pick up too! Why is it just dogs that have to?”. That made me laugh my paws off!! Just picture the image of a horse rider having to get off the horse after it has had a poo and pick that lot up! They’d need dustbin sacks!!!

I saw some marquees being erected in the field opposite Flower Farm

The really good thing about Marden Park is the places to explore and sniff. I picked up loads of new PMails and I managed to leave quite a few Comments too! I ran up and down every possible path and backwards and forwards everywhere! Marden Park is very, very hilly and by the time we got back to the car thingy I was totally cream crackered! Mind you, I think they were too! I mentioned at the beginning that I have been to a festival. It all began about a week or so ago when I noticed that there were some marquees being erected in the field opposite Flower Farm. There were loads of bails of straw being delivered too. I had, of course, seen the signs around the village (and farther afield) advertising ‘Godstoneberry’ but I wasn’t really sure what it was. It turns out that it is Surrey’s largest Beer and Music Festival – or at least that’s what the signs say! I have had a little look but I haven’t found much online about beer and music festivals. Fidopedia has loads of stuff about religious festivals but naff all about beer and music festivals. I did notice a bit of chatter going on on Whatsyap but that was mainly “Are you going?” and “I’ll meet you there” kind of stuff.

I actually went to Godstoneberry on Saturday with Auntie Zena but don’t tell him!!

It turns out that they have their own website (https://godstoneberry.com) and I managed to find out far more from that. It looked quite good so I asked Daddy Richard if we could go – there is absolutely no point in asking him because he’s much more likely to say no! Daddy Richard said that, if I was good, we could go on Sunday. It turns out that they had to go to Market Harborough on Saturday to “sort the last few things in Grandma’s house out”. I’m not sure where Market Harborough is but I know it’s further away than Reigate Hill. We got up on Saturday morning very early and went out for a walk. We walked along Salisbury Road and then through Dewlands and up Green Lane. Green Lane is at the back of the field where Godstoneberry was being held and there were loads of people camping in tents and caravans and things and then, further up Green Lane was were the stages were. At that time in the morning there weren’t really any people about other than security guards. Despite this you could still feel atmosphere of party! When we got home they went off almost immediately. I was left to guard the house but I didn’t have to do that for very long because it wasn’t long before Nana and Grandad arrived!!!! I didn’t know they were coming so it was a luvely surprise! They stayed all day and did loads of stuff. Grandad brought their own vacuum cleaner and hoovered the carpets – there was hardly a hair left when he had finished! I’m not sure but I think he must have thought that it was getting a bit hairy and their Dyson isn’t up to the job! Anyway, I had a luvely time with them and then, as if things couldn’t get any better, at lunchtime Auntie Zena and Uncle Simon came to take me out for a walk!

We watched loads of bands at Godstoneberry! Some were better than others but it was all great fun!

I’m trusting that my loyal fans won’t let this out but we actually went to Godstoneberry! When we went on Sunday I had to pretend that it was my first time there. I think he may have suspected something when I dragged him straight to the entrance and then to where you buy ‘Berries’ once inside, but I think I got away with it! When they eventually arrived home on Saturday they were both quite grumpy. It turns out it took them three hours to get back from Grandma’s house in Market Harborough and then an hour to get off the motorway because the lights were out of phase … again! (Not that I have a clue what that means but they were definitely grumpy about it!) I’m a little bit jealous actually because I didn’t go and I’ve since discovered that they saw Auntie Jo when they were there. I don’t get to see her very often but I love it when I do. Apparently there wasn’t enough room in the car thingy for me and it was a long journey there and back in a day. Oh well, maybe next time. He did say that they’re going to go back to Market Harborough with Grandma next month so maybe I’ll get to go then!

This act was called ‘Jamie and the Jets’ and was an Elton John tribute band. I rather liked them!

I got a great surprise when we arrived at Godstoneberry on Sunday – I got to meet Radar! Despite the fact that I still don’t trust him when he goes off to ‘work’ and comes back smelling of other dogs, I think I’ve changed my mind about Radar. He’s really cool! He’s also enormous! He’s still only a puppy (he’s 8 months old) but he’s huge! He’s going to be a very big doggy! I know I’ve mentioned this before but he is not very bright … at the back of the queue when they were giving out brains, if you get my gist! He didn’t get a single photo of Radar, let alone a photo of Radar and me! Honestly, talk about dim! I like Radar – as soon as I sniffed him I knew who he was and I think he did the same with me. He was with Auntie Wendy and her daughter Rianna. How’s this for coincidence … it only turns out that Auntie Wendy went to the same school as Auntie Zena and Uncle Simon! She remembered them!! I really liked meeting Radar and, whilst I will never forgive him for always coming back smelling of other doggies, I don’t mind about Radar anymore because he’s cool!! I’m going to try and get him to take a photo of Radar for my next Glog – mind you, he’s bound to forget!

I popped outside for a quick dip before laying down to push out a few 💤s

Talking of friends – I haven’t seen my friend Charlie for flamin’ ages! I know he lives in France but that’s hardly any excuse. I’m flamin’ sure it isn’t beyond the wit of man (OK, maybe it is beyond the wit of one man in particular!) for them to organise a trip to France so that I can see my friend Charlie. I’m going to have a bark in his ear about it! Anyway, back to Godstoneberry – I had an absolutely fabulous time. Towards the end I was getting quite hungry and they wouldn’t let me hoover up all the food that had been dropped on the ground. The last act was called ‘The South’, apparently they were kind of reformed from a band that used to be called ‘The Beautiful South’ but some singers left and so they can’t call themselves that anymore. They were good but I was really hungry so as soon as they finished I dragged them home and I had my dinner. I felt much better after that, although I hadn’t realised just how cream crackered I was. I finished my dinner, popped outside for a quick dip (just so that I could come in and shake it over him!) and then lay down to push out a few 💤s. The next thing I knew it was this morning! Yesterday was definitely the best day ever, I wonder how today will pan out! There’s only one way to find out so, for now, must paws … 🐾

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