Ok, it wasn’t quite what I expected. I mean, don’t get me wrong, it was fine, but the weather was dreadful, they were moaning about the cold and there wasn’t quite as much to do as I had hoped. You see, we went to the Dog’s Trust Open Day in Shoreham-by-Sea on the Sunday before last. We left home and it was 21 degrees and sunny – by the time we got to Shoreham-by-Sea it was 14 degrees, very overcast and very, very windy. That didn’t bode well for a good day out! We queued for about a year to get to the car park and then, when we got in and parked, we had a 40 mile trek to the Dog’s Trust. Don’t misunderstand me, that isn’t a problem for me, but being so windy and cold it wasn’t the most pleasant of walks. When we had paid our entrance and got in, we had a walk round. There were lots and lots of tombola stalls! That was what I noticed first. That and stalls selling plants. There didn’t appear to be too much dog related stuff that I could sniff at, although we did eventually find a rather spiffing stall selling rather spiffing bandannas. What was it called? The Monty Dog Shop!!!! Obviously we had to buy one!
So, having procured a bandanna – I think I sport it rather well actually – we walked around a little more but didn’t see too much to interest us. We bought a few bits from the Dog’s Trust stall, but that was more about supporting them than anything else. The Dog’s Trust was, after all, where I made the decision to go home with them. OK, it wasn’t Shoreham-by-Sea, it was Canterbury and, OK, so I admit that it wasn’t an entirely brilliant decision. Don’t get me wrong, I like living where I live and I like walking around the village and strutting my stuff. I love all the people I meet; Auntie Angela and Auntie Sue and Auntie Zena and Auntie Cathy and Auntie Rosemary and Uncle Bren and Uncle Simon and Uncle Tony and my bestest friend in the whole wide world, Jake. I love Daddy Richard and the only real downside is that the price I have to pay for all that is that I have to put up with him! I suppose he isn’t too bad … in small doses! Mind you, he’s gone off again today. I knew something was up when he got up at 5 o’clock in the morning. He got a shower and started packing a case. I know the signs! Daddy Richard got up too and then took me for a quick walk around the block. The next thing I knew they had both gone off in the car thingy and only Daddy Richard came home a little while later! I think I’ve heard him talking about going to somewhere called Monaco but I have no idea where that is and I can’t be bothered to look it up. It just means I get to spend some quality time with Daddy Richard!
After we left the Dog’s Trust in Shoreham-by-Sea we got back in the car thingy and I assumed we were going home. It turned out that we weren’t. We were off to somewhere new. We have never been there before but we went to a place called Buchan Country Park. I rather like Buchan Country Park! It is near Crawley which isn’t too far away from home. We used to go to a place called Tilgate Park but, despite there having been a few ‘incidents’ there, the reason we don’t go there anymore is not because of them but because they decided that dogs are not allowed to be off lead anymore. Whilst I don’t mind dragging them around, it is hardly great fun for me or them!! Buchan Country Park is much more sensible. When you get out of the car thingy there are signs saying that dogs must be kept on a lead in that area. Then, when you’ve left the car park thingy and walked a few metres away from it, there are signs saying, “Dog’s may be off lead from this point”. That’s a proper way of dealing with the matter! We had a luvely time running around (well, I do all of the running but they eventually catch me up!) and I had a jolly good sniff. It appears that lots of other dogs use Buchan Country Park judging by the amount of messages I found.
There was one message of particular interest – it told me that there is a ‘Doggy Dip’ in the park. I had noticed a couple of messages about it on the way around. Now, you can imagine what he had to say about it. Oh, he did not want me to try out the ‘Doggy Dip’! But then, when have I ever listened to him!! Of course I tried it out. It was fab!!! I dipped a paw in the water and it was lovely and cool (we had left Shoreham-by-Sea at 14 degrees but back in Crawley it was now 21 degrees!). I stepped in a bit further and it was luvely. So, in the end I pretty much got in all the way. Honestly, you should have heard the language! I mean, some of it doesn’t even appear in Fidopedia – you have to looked at the Urging Dicktionary and I can tell you that some of the definitions are not for a young dog’s ears!!!! Anyway, there we were – him shouting obscenities from the side of the lake. Daddy Richard laughing like a drain because he knew what was coming next … and me, stood there cooling off for a minute. After a couple of minutes, I climbed out and had a jolly good shake … all over him! When we got back to the car thingy he changed my new bed to the towelling side so that I could dry off a bit on the way home and off we went.
Now, I don’t like to complain too much, but all he did all evening when we got home was accuse me of smelling. How so very dare he!! Me? Smell? The very thought of it! Oh, and then it was “What about your new bandana? You hadn’t even been wearing it much more than an hour!!!! Now I’m going to have to wash it!” What a fuss about nothing! I did try snuggling up to him to try and remind him that I am than handsomest dog in dogdom but all he did is sniff and turn his nose up! Mind you, I tried it with Daddy Richard and he wasn’t a lot better! Humans can be very odd sometimes!! So, where were we? Oh yes, I had better provide a Pupdate! Eric is doing well. He is beginning to distinguish between an ‘s’ and a ‘sh’ – although there does seem to be a bit of a new challenge. It seems that he’s learned the word ‘sit’ so well that when he leaves the house to go for a walk, that’s exactly what he does! Auntie Sue tries to get him to walk but he does about two paces and then sits down!! He’s fine elsewhere, just whenever he leaves his own house. Mind you, it is a funny sight … Auntie Sue throwing bits of chicken in front of him and him getting to the chicken, eating it and then sitting down! I’m not sure that Auntie Sue finds it quite so amusing, but I do and I’ve even heard him laughing about it!!
Grandma came to see us the other day. That was nice. I got to spend a bit of quality time with her. To be honest, quality time with Grandma usually involves quite a lot of sleeping. There I am, offering myself up for some serious patting or stroking and she goes and nods off! That said, it does give me an opportunity to push out a few ????s, which is always a good thing. Apparently it was Café Connect but I wasn’t even invited. Apparently the ‘logistics’ of picking Grandma up and getting her to Café Connect and then getting me there are all too difficult! Mind you, talking of logs, it won’t come as any great surprise to my regular fans that he has been moaning about them too. There we were, sauntering up Green Lane and there laying on the ground was the most wonderful looking stick/log/branch of a tree. It was, quite literally, irresistible – so I didn’t! I lay down on the ground, got myself into a good chewing position – a good chewing position is essential to get the most out a log chewing experience – and had a jolly good gnaw on it. It was luvely!! Mind you, talking of eating something. I have been feeling a little delicate for the last few days. We went to Limpsfield Chart on Sunday and I had a jolly good run around but I think I may have eaten something (well, obviously I ate everything I could find) because I’ve been a little loose in the bottom department. Still, I didn’t have any breakfast this morning and I’m hoping a little rest might do me good. I’m sure I’ll be fine in a day or so!
So, that’s about the state of things at the moment. He has trotted off to this place called Monaco – oh, he claims it’s work, he claims it’s cream crackering getting up at five in the morning, travelling to wherever it is (he’s just sitting on a fairyplane doing nothing – how tiring is that!), doing a day of “meetings”, attending an awards dinner in the evening, finishing at two in the morning and then having to be at the conference by eight the following morning for another day of “meetings”. Oh, and he’s speaking at the conference too! Apparently there are about 3,000 people there including the great and the good from the ‘industry’ – whatever that is – well, I can tell them all they’re wasting their time and money. I have to hear him ‘speaking’ all the flamin’ time and I can tell you that a) he’s repetitive … “Monty, don’t do that” and “Monty, do that” and “Monty!!! That isn’t funny” and “Monty! The good people of Church Lane might be able to open their windows again by August!”, and b) the language!!! I don’t know where he gets it from! Honestly, some of the things he says would make me blush if only I was capable of blushing! Anyway, I’m spending a few days of quality time with Daddy Richard which is nice. Daddy Richard doesn’t shout at me (much!). Daddy Richard doesn’t use words that even Doogle would rather not give definitions for (much!) and Daddy Richard is much easier to tow than him! I’d better go and see if he fancies a walk so, for now, must paws … ????